RC: Okay but what is your question? What are you asking me?
Greg: Do you like the band because of their hot shiny cocks?
RC: Well I've never SEEN their hot shiny cocks, I'm sure they HAVE hot...shiny...
Greg: Yeah okay, you're cut off-
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Greg: Okay, we're talking with Thomas what?
Tom: Knocks. um..I.. (Okay, I have no idea why this says "Knocks" or why we thought that, because this kid's name is Tom D'arcy evidently. I would also like to add at this time that he is hot)
Greg: yeah, okay shut up. Of The Nation and we're going to ask him a few questions
Drunk girl: Is this an interview heh heeh hee?
Greg: yeah, it is, so shut up please. What color is your toothbrush and what is your theory on death, Thomas Knocks of the Nation?
Tom: Uh..my toothbrush has a yellowish hue.
Greg: What's your theory on death? Do you even brush your teeth?
Tom: You see, that's the thing- when I do, it gets quite dirty.
Greg: Alright, enough about the toothbrush, what's your theory on death. How're you gonna die Tom?
Tom: Uh...probably in a car crash, I don't know I've had a lot of dreams about that.
Greg: Okay, how's your best friend gonna die?
Tom: I'll probably kill him because I'll get really bitter...find some flaw with him
Greg: Okay, now, according to your answer to that question, who is your favorite Pokemon?
Drunk girl: Who's your favorite what?
Greg: This is a question for Tom.
Tom: No comment
Greg: Sorry, Bubble and Squeak does not accept "no comment."
Tom: Pokechu? Isn't that one? Me: Pikachu!?!? Tom: yeah.
Greg: Pikachu? Okay, the interview can go on. If you're walking down the street and you find a decapitated head with $100 in the mouth do you take the money?
Tom: I'd take both.
Me: What would you do with the head?
Tom: Oh I would spend the $100 on fuels to burn the head and have a sacrifice.
Greg: And what kind of sacrifice would that be? To maybe the mormons maybe? Or the freemasons? Scottish Rite?
Tom: It would be for the Carnations
Greg: It would be for the Nation.
Tom: For the Carnations...the band.
Greg: Who'd you have to suck off to close for Hefner, Tom?
Tom: Dave Brookman- from the Indie Hour called and asked and-- (some girl grabs Tom's arm and attempts to lure his smelly ass away from our brute force interview attack)
Greg: Hey! Don't you DARE let your girlfriend take control of you, man. Okay, define MANKEY. And is there any alcohol in the drink you're drinking?
Tom: No this is pure water
Greg: Well then fuck off, define "mankey."
Tom: This is a word that I should personally define?
Greg: Yeah, yeah. I'm going to say a word and you give your definition of it. "MANKEY!"
Tom: Uh...well, Steve? You wanna take this one?
Greg: No this is Tom, we'll get to Steve in a second, alright TOM. Don't try and back out of this shit
Tom: Well, if you're tying to pick up a guy and-
Greg: Okay bye. Okay, if you were in a good band what band would you be in?
Tom: Silverchair probably.
Greg: Zed or Z? Tom: Zed.
Greg: why? Cuz, you know, that fucks up the whole rhyme. So why would you pick zed?
Tom: It was just kind of an impulse.
Greg: Would you ever skull fuck the dancing guy from the Parts Unknown set?
Tom: Yeah, in a second! I think about that sometimes.
Greg: Would you really? Well how many beers or homoerotic dreams of Pikachu would it take?
Tom: hah hahah hahahah hahah
Greg: Okay you can stop laughing now.
Tom: Pi.
Greg: Who did the art direction for the 'Sweetness Lies Within" video?
Tom: I have no idea.
Greg: You should do your fucking read-up on the band you're playing with, asshole.
Tom: Well I actually never heard the band we're playing with
Greg: yeah, okay. Why'd you play a free show here?
Tom: Um..because they asked us to and it's kind of a regular habit. It's not like anyone's gonna pay us.
Elizabeth: Tom, where do you see yourself in 5 years?
Tom: I have no idea.
